Christmas dread: Top reasons people struggle with the day and how to respond to common stressors

The Festive Season is fun for some, but for others it might actually not be the most wonderful time of the year. 2023 has been another big year both at the collective and individual levels, with more people than ever experiencing mental health problems, on top of all the ups and downs that come naturally as part of our human existence.

So, if you’re not feeling particularly great about the fast approaching silly season, please know first and foremost that you’re not alone. I want to share with you some different tools you may like to use to cope with the holidays, depending on what you’re experiencing.

If you’re feeling lonely, the holidays can absolutely amplify those feelings. With working from home, and spending less time at community events, many of us are finding our social circles becoming smaller and smaller. The festive season can really exacerbate this - especially if you won’t be sharing this time with family or friends. Some ways you could foster connection these holidays could be to volunteer within your local community, or even writing cards for neighbours can be a sweet and simple way to say hello and reconnect.

If you’re feeling the financial strain this holiday season, know you’re not alone. 2023 has been a tough year for many, and the added costs for food and gifts in December can really stack up. But here’s the thing, so many of us are in the same boat this year. So maybe you could have a chat with your loved ones and opt for a potluck meal instead (I know my family is doing Secret Santa to save on the amount of presents to buy!). In terms of gifts, many people won’t be expecting any this year - time with loved ones is of course the biggest gift of all.

If you’re feeling anxious these holidays (or anytime, really), it’s important to make sure you’re putting yourself first. Whether it’s certain activities, events, or seeing family and friends you’re not usually in contact with, it’s not uncommon to feel your anxiety bubbling to the surface this time of year. I think it’s important to take time for yourself and doing the things that genuinely fill your cup; even if that’s binge-watching your favourite show on Netflix for 2 days. Many of us feel this pressure to pack the break full of activities, but the truth is that it’s okay to do nothing. It has been another really big year for many people, and taking time for rest and recovery may be exactly what you need.

If you’re struggling with body image, the lead up to family gatherings often means preparing yourself to fend off unhelpful comments about your appearance or eating. Sometimes those comments can actually be really distressing, triggering and harmful, particularly if you’re already experiencing body image issues. If someone makes a comment about the way you look, or the food you’re eating, it’s okay to take some time out if you need it. Maybe you can excuse yourself to go to the bathroom, or step outside to play with a pet - whatever works to shift the focus.

Of course another option is to change the direction of the conversation, for example, if someone mentions you’ve lost weight, you could reply with “And what’s been happening with you this year?”. Simple, yet effective!

All in all, the holidays aren’t always amazing - and that’s okay.

Take time when you need it, make sure you continue to do your usual self-care activities and remember to put yourself first wherever possible.